Recently I shared some positive "success" stories of Aimee and college. Truly, she has excelled in that environment, and I shared this only to say that very relaxed, interest-guided, non-traditional learning (and Aimee could fairly accurately be called unschooled) prepares a student very, very well for college work. Some of you had some questions for me after my posts. It's been hard to answer these questions because the last thing I want to do is try to convince someone that what we are doing is right for them. If a person doesn't have the vision and "faith" for this, it won't work. This is not the only way to homeschool, but it's the best way for my family.

I felt badly for a few days after my posts, thinking that maybe I had said too much, boasted too much. It's true that Aimee is doing well in college, but what if she didn't go to college? What if college wasn't her thing? Is success measured only in terms of academic measurement? These are rhetorical questions because I know you guys have priorities beyond academic success.

My 19yo (Michelle) has "graduated" from our homeschool, and she works in a dog kennel. She has had absolutely no desire to attend college. Right now she is really struggling with what she wants to do, where she is going, etc. Michelle was the least academically oriented of my children (do not mistake this for less intelligent!). She has a creative bent-- is a very good writer and artist. When she was young, she was busy and active and creative. She ran and jumped, built things, wrote stories, started a wonderful sticker newsletter with her sister, read lots of books, made stop animation movies, studied nature and science topics as well as history topics. In childhood, Michelle learned in pure delight. As she grew older, she began to drop things more quickly, and she often tended not to go as deep academically in anything as her siblings (whose standards are very high). I told Michelle not to feel any pressure to be anything or do anything, but to relax and be herself. Just to hang in there. In high school, she decided what she wanted to learn and how, but the delight always seemed to be tinged with too much duty. She did much, but struggled to find her niche. If you could see her artwork and read her stories, you'd be shocked that she's not pursuing this with energy, but she isn't. She does some artwork fairly often, and in spite of her talent, it doesn't seem to be a true passion (maybe it will someday). She created a beautiful, sweet pastel drawing for me for Christmas (she's at least as talented as Melissa, whose artwork was posted here recently). I told you about Michelle's wonderful ornithology study last spring, and it truly was indepth and delightful. The book she created of her project is amazing. Friends of mine (who know of Michelle's artistic talent) had heard she was doing this project. When they saw the end product they were stunned saying, "I expected it to be beautiful, but *this* needs to be published! Virtually everyone who sees the book says it should be published.

So, here I have a girl with talent, who is also a girl taking some time to think about things. Maybe she doesn't want to do anything with her art. She says she feels aimless, that she wants to pour herself into something, and she can't figure out why she's struggling to do that. I don't know. I worried that our expectations were too high, but she insists that's not it. She insists she doesn't feel pressured to achieve just what her siblings have achieved. I don't think she's burned out because she was free to do things her own way, and I never pushed for any particular study or product. Sooo... does this make Michelle less "successful" or significant than Aimee? Of course not! If Michelle never goes to college and never pursues her art or writes stories (she used to say she wanted to write and illustrate children's books)... if she keeps working at the kennel for years on end, is that not okay? Her boss already gave her a raise and told me that I've raised a wonderful, mature, hardworking, responsible girl. If Michelle will love God, walk with Him, and serve Him with all of her heart, I'll be happy. Very, very happy.

Both Aimee and Michelle are products of the same homeschool environment. Both of them are very different people doing very different things. (My other two children tend to be more like Aimee than Michelle.) Does Aimee's college 4.0 GPA and rave comments by professors validate our homeschool environment? Not at all, but I did share her story just to show that unstructured, nontraditional learning doesn't leave a child unprepared for college, for traditional learning. If Michelle was my only, I would feel just as strongly about the way we learn because I'm not looking for a certain outcome that will impress anyone. I think Michelle has gained the tools for learning. I know she would excel in college, too, IF she *wanted* to go. I think she knows that education is a lifelong thing. In fact, I'd say that she continues to learn, just not in purely academic ways. She reads, she writes, she learned her job more quickly than any trainee and she learned it well. She organizes. She cooks creatively. She does artwork frequently enough (and studies artwork, too). She joins our discussions. I'm happy with that.

So, now that I have that off my chest, I'll say before answering specific questions about the details of just how we did things, that our style of homeschooling is really an attitude, a lifestyle, a way of thinking and living. It requires an ability to let go of scope and sequence. It means not being intimidated by the so-called experts or by the established educational system-- a system that is most emphatically not working, in my opinion.

I got to the point where I didn't give a rip what was the scope and sequence of the public schools. This letting go truly enabled me to relax and see all the pursuits of my children as important to their development, even when they didn't *appear* to be remotely "educational." Relaxed or delight-led or interest-based or unschooled learning (or whatever label you prefer) probably won't give you a product that matches scope and sequence standards, but it will produce what I think is a superior education and will better prepare a student for life than assignment-oriented learning. Others-- especially traditionalists-- may disagree. Children are not programmed to follow a scope and sequence. They are bent by God a certain, individual way, and to try to fit them-- however gently-- into that mold does not serve their best interests, in my opinion. If keeping pace with the public or private schools, or more commonly, if *staying ahead* of public or private schoolers (while running your homeschool choo choo train on their tracks) is the way you prefer to set up your homeschool, then more power to you, and I wish you great success in your goals. Truly.

But, for those who are looking for something different, for those whose children who continually balk at assignments, who resist passive learning, who long to run and play and be free, if you can "let go" and get a vision for something different, then maybe you'll find a whole new path to tramp. Not our path, but your own unique, interesting and wonderful path.

I want to share a few things that I think were essential in making possible the atmosphere that produced four lively learners in our homeschool. I do think I have four very creative, imaginative thinkers. They know how to think, they know how to communicate, they are well-read, they are knowledgable about many things, they are *alive.* They are not perfect-- oh no, not by any means-- but they do possess the tools of learning and they do like to use them!

(go on to page 4)