ADDICTED TO HPT 

OK We all at sometime have been addicted to HPT

Home Pregnancy Tests

How bad can this get a hpt addiction, Out of control believe me £££££££

When I first started ttc it was fine,I had no need to test as Af would always rear its ugly head, But as the months went on the more I charted and learned about my body,I found myself buying tests kits 9 days after Ovulation or having no signs of Af arriving and thinking I had no cramping or brown cm,So there was I all geared up thinking I must be pg, Down to my local Chemist,pharmacy to get my Clearblue double pack,Would get home still no Af,

 ohh i must test cant stand the wait any longer, So i would do a test no line appears, But then i start to think i can see something in the background, So there was I tilting the test from all different light angles,convinced i could see something, Even running into dh saying can you see a line, hes not sure either and wanting another child so much with every month slipping by 4 years ttc, We so badly wanted to see that line.Then i would get up early in the morning to test again Still no visible line, But my mind is telling me there is,DH gets up and says did you do the other test I lie and say no i,ll wait until later,Then i have to creep to the chemist pharmacy again to get another twin pack,I did this quite abit and dh still doesnt know what i used to get upto even pretending i had forgotten headache tablets etc, It was one excuse after another to go back to the chemist. Well this went on i would say for a good six months.Even at one stage me phoning the chemist in advance of af to put a double clear blue test in a bag sealed for dh to collect..,Some months i would spend £40.00 on tests alone, Crazy I know, But i so wanted to be pregnant again and wanted to know asap.

I made all sorts of excuses here are just a few

I done the test the wrong time of day?

I drank too much tea my pee is too diluted.

I havnt held my bladder for more then 4 hours

I can see something in the background?(or can I) better get another test.

I Changed brand of tests as friends told me about another test in U.S early first response so there was i 8.00pm at night go searching for a uk chemist who sells efr, which is some 6 miles away, But yes i made dh drive me there and stock piled them lol.

It really did get out of control and embarrasing too as i knew everytime i walked into a chemist, pharmacy where i lived they knew it was me again the clearblue girl, Whos keeping them in business.I can imagine the blue rinse squad sales lady behind the counter sniggering with her assistant about me as i walked away you could imagine sharing everyones business amongst customers,Or giving a frown nod.Every chemist knew me in the area.

Then the obsessions got worse, I know how can it get worse, i hear you laughing?

I bought ovulation test kits at £20 + every month,for about 6 months which is a con as it takes a few months to work out what days really to test. So after counting the cost of that and the pg tests I decided to buy a monitor,Which was £100.00 then the test sticks at £10.00 a month. the ££££££££££ was going up and up,But every little thing i could think of in desperation to get pregnant i would try.Still dh had no awareness to how much i was spending as i used to then put it on my credit card and hide the tests in my coat inner pocket.He thought i just buy double test kit a month.So at the highest point of my HPT ADDICTION I must have been spending £60-£70.00 a month just on test kits for Ovulation and HPT.

So now 1 year later on  nearly 5 years of ttc several Miscarriages and being told that ICSI was our only hope after they discovered dh had severe male factor, I had endo with fibroids & luteal Phase defect.I gave up and thought i,m not going to get pregnant on my own and stopped buying the tests.

We was put on the NHS waiting list for ICSI which a year had then passed, when my son became very ill again and was rushed into hospital JAN 02, Our concern was for him only and ttc was not even on our mind anymore.That was it we was finished with ttc,I came online and a friend of mine asked me why i hadnt updated my chart, I said about my son being in hospital for the last few weeks it was also my dh birthday the following day and I hadnt even gotten him anything,because of all the rushing about,She then said but joe its been 6 weeks since your last period, I said cant be,She then replied go check it yourself.I thought i had made some sort of mistake,I knew i had one test left from months ago after the visit to the hospital and our bad news and thought shall I, So nervous and thinking its the stress and wprry of my sick child which had delayed AF appearing.So I peed on the test stick and held it in my hand the first window started to fill and OMG the darkest Blue line i ever did see,Then the confirmation line to say the test was done correct.....I was in shock I contained myself i dont know how and rushed back to the internet to tell my friends......

I then opened DH birthday card and stuck the test stick in the centre of the card and put it under his pillow for the following morning...Thats the best present ever i thought.

DH woke in the morning not even celebrating his birthday and not exspecting anything,litle did he know it would be a baby.I told him to help me change the bed and out dropped the envelope from his pillow.He opened the card and the look on his face said it all,the air was blue with swear words of joy,The kids wondered was was happening and we looked like 2 little school children hiding a secret both saying "nothing" at the same time and grinning at each other.

 

ELLESSE was born on 1st November 2002 at 36weeks

 

ELLESSE ON HOLIDAY IN FLORIDA NOV 03

 

ELLESSE AT CHRISTMAS 2003

 

after nearly 6 years ttc with all the odds against us.

I then got a phone call from the fertility clinic after 18 months of being on the NHS ICSI list,I was 3 months pregnant by this stage saying I had reached the top of the list and did i want to start meds for egg retrievel.I told the lady my story and she couldnt believe from my records that i was Pregnant by miracle.

Moto is dont go buying test kits too early in cycle,or else you too will end up obsessed and finding the same reasons i did to buy more and more ££££££

Dont test again the same day its a waste of time and £

Only buy a minimum of 1 double pack a month only if you are really sure you maybe pg.

Always go for a recommended brand it may cost a little extra but its worth it.

Dont let the pharmacy lady work out when your due in next month lol

BUT MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL NEVER GIVE UP HOPE

remember laughter is the best medicine of all,Laugh and the whole world laughs with you.

Posted by Bink Joe 8th May 2004